So this is what fear really is
This heart wrenching pain
This pacing the floor waiting for a call from half way around the world

As I look into the eyes of those younger than me
Not knowing what to say to keep their fears at bay
While a war wages on inside trying so desperately hard to keep my smile

Reassurance for them means everything
But for me reassurance doesn't come
To hear the pain and fear in my mother's voice reassurance means nothing

I don't know he'll come back alive
I don't know if his will is strong
I don't know the doctors can fix everything that's gone so wrong

And I'm her best friend, my mother's that is
So I have to be confident when she's weak
I'm the strong shoulder she's leaning on from half way around the world

It's a burden I'm willing to carry
For it doesn't feel like a burden at all
It's what any oldest daughter would do when her mother is all alone

But as soon as I hang up the phone I have to sit down
Take a moment to compose myself
Because all the phone calls I have to make may drain every ounce of what it takes

To keep myself together
Because fear has taken over
As my father lays in the hospital fighting deaths tight hold

01/07/2007

Author's Note: My parents are half way across the world and my dad has double pnemonia and bacteria in his blood. We don't know if he'll make it...pray for him please.

Posted on 01/07/2007
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