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adolescent party games
by Jared Fladelandi've got sins on my side.
What a bottle spins
it takes for freedom,
and when the open neck
points in your direction:
Will you give me a little kiss?
Turn off the lights
and dance the phonetic alphabet on my tongue. 09/20/2006 Posted on 09/20/2006
Copyright © 2024 Jared Fladeland
| Member Comments on this Poem |
| Posted by Leslie Ann Eisenberg on 09/29/06 at 04:57 AM oh yummy! reminds me of a 7th grade party....spin the bottle, followed by "2 minutes in the closet!" funny, i don't remember it being quite as sensual as you describe. i like your version better!! ;)PK |
| Posted by Quinlan L Gibson on 11/11/06 at 05:49 PM "open neck" is brilliant. Nice work. |
| Posted by Katerina T Nix on 11/29/06 at 02:18 AM Is it a little warm in here? Great read, I too remember those parties. -Kat |
| Posted by Katerina T Nix on 11/29/06 at 02:19 AM Also, I agree with Leila about the last line. :) |
| Posted by Cristy M. on 12/16/06 at 09:08 PM look, those last two lines...i should've written them. they're very keen. in fact, i so should've written them that i'm stealing this ditty from you and calling it my own. no, i kid. honestly, it's very good. very cute. the only thing i would reconsider is the word "freedom." mind you, only because that's one of those words that i would never write. not that it doesn't word, but i'm sure you could find a word that fits better. |
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