I would love to hate her,
because it hurts so much to love her.
I wanted to believe we could survive anything.
I thought I was saving my life,
saving a friendship.
It turns out I was just saving it for later
to watch it be spent on something silly.
Squandered for a single day.
Leaving us both feeling used and hurt.
I never thought of my friends as single use,
I thought I could just keep using them
time and time again
as I allowed myself to be used.
I'd envisioned friendship as a flower,
I did not know that it was an annual
I assumed I'd planted perennials.
That has always been a flaw
I can see all too well
yet I never read the small print.

06/27/2006

Author's Note: Watching a friendship wither and die is never easy.

Posted on 06/27/2006
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