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On the Sands By the Sea.

by Steven Craig



I am and would like to remain your true friend, a man yes, but your true friend none the less... I realize your fears now, and what they are. I also know that making the lifestyle turn is difficult as hell... if only it was a dream instead... but its not... and more than most anyone you will ever meet, I do understand. If you chose another, if you chose to stay with the lifestyle you've come to know and continue to pursue, I will still remain your friend until you choose to sever it. I can not say anything against what you are going through, what you have to see through, or what you have done. That is not what friends do... they support, care, understand, and above all, listen. Even if you did call me, even if you did overcome that fear of being betrayed, even if we did meet, there would still be me, wouldn't there? I and my feelings and my chemistry is also a part of the whole... even if you did want we desperately, I would still have to be frank and true with me as well... and I would.

This is not to say I would not want you... because I may indeed want just that... but the uncertainty is there, and I will be my own judge. But for me to know what I am in your life, there are those issues above that we talked about to take care of first.

I sit here with my machine alone, near the lapping sea, quietly, gently rolling onto the sand. I can hear birds nearby, and they sing to me of Mary, gentle Mary, from many years ago... forgive me if I am in error, but I have been writing at this little thing for a while....it seems so much to describe what I have heard from your heart.

It is not you alone that feels this way, I have found it all over the world, in women almost everywhere... abuse, abandonment, neglect, ignored, beaten, scared, molested... used. I have tried to give them my endless heart, and a few have taken it and found it did not fill their emptiness, a few have taken it, and tried to ease their pain by hurting me, a few have taken it and not known what they had, for love was an alien thing. And just a few, have taken it, and cherish me and all I have given them with memories that will never die. What greater thing can one do in life than to give love to those that need it...

06/23/2006

Posted on 06/24/2006
Copyright © 2020 Steven Craig

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