Love String Theory
by Julie Adams
to the present
to this moment
when we tango
with love, leading
and summer days
once we drifted
from all we know
toward each other
like dancers, lured
by a pulse
at the core of us,
to the cosmos
night after night
I walked along
the placid waters
at the Southern tip
looking for you
from across the shore,
in the smile
your eyes carried
on soft winds
from your lips,
I strolled along
Eastside shores, still
moving toward you,
in another life
in another city,
of the tongue
Author's Note: Note: the italicized lines 42-44, stanza 2, are taken from Emily Fragos' poem "Path" which inspired this piece...please look it up if interested, she teaches a poetry workshop I am taking for 6 weeks...Enjoy!
Posted on 05/15/2006
Copyright © 2021 Julie Adams
|Member Comments on this Poem|
|Posted by Michael Faraday on 05/15/06 at 04:10 PM|
nice first draft. :)
|Posted by Joan Serratelli on 05/16/06 at 07:03 PM|
I think this could definitely stand as is- loved the image of being pulled like puppets. Very good and vivid images here!
|Posted by Ashok Sharda on 05/17/06 at 01:53 PM|
Well, vibrations does create a magnetic field if they emanate from the opposite poles and pulls. What matters is the quality of energies that vibrats.If they are refined, the pull is intense and ever lasting.No words needed. They communicate unsaid.By the way, this piece contains beautiful matter but some work on the form is needed. Let the matter determine its own form.
|Posted by JD Clay on 05/18/06 at 02:04 AM|
You had me from the get go, jewels. Powerful opening that really sets the tone (no pun). Equally impressive is the way each line represents itself, especially when you pause ever so briefly from one to the next. I also like the way the ending reinforces the title.
|Posted by Elizabeth Jill on 05/18/06 at 05:00 PM|
meaningful to me in a most personal way, I love this poem
|Posted by Kathleen Wilson on 05/18/06 at 08:54 PM|
Beautiful tempo...and the long line from past to future...effective and dancing...do you dance those dances with more than your imagination? I do!
|Posted by Karl Waldbauer on 05/19/06 at 01:45 AM|
Great rhythm...I had to re-read several times because I kept getting lost in the beat. Great work, Julie.
|Posted by Sandy M. Humphrey on 05/19/06 at 09:04 PM|
How cleverly you set this poem in motion with the first word and then the flow, you gave it movement and history...excellent framing..with each line time passes, such a excellent piece. smh
|Posted by Kelvin Tan on 05/24/06 at 04:16 AM|
I'm tapping my feet to the beat of Love String Theory.. by far the most musical poem I've read. Infectious and catchy piece.. v well done! :-)
|Posted by Rula Shin on 05/26/06 at 01:49 AM|
Wonderful piece indeed. The matter seems to have determined it's own form after all! What a flow and the string theory of love...pulling me straight into the heart of belief. Nicely done!
|Posted by Michelle Angelini on 09/24/06 at 05:10 AM|
Jewels, it's been a long time since I read one of your poems - I'm glad it was this one. The flow is circular and tender, along with the images that are peaceful as the sun sinking into the sea's horizon.
|Posted by Kathleen Wilson on 01/08/07 at 03:39 AM|
What I like best about this poem are the specific places mentioned-- the "Southern tip" --the "Eastside shores"--these things balance the
"unknown" and bring the experiences to life in geography.