|
Rose Tinted Spectacles
by Ben EvansAfter youd apologised
for sitting on the sofa
that had my reading-glasses
with pink lenses on
And Id come to the sad
conclusion that
you could hardly be
read as easily as before
I picked my way between
towels and lovers and
picked green beach-glass
like a heron picks fish.
Having gathered glass and
shrapnel and a pair of pliers
(to serve the manipulation
of the former) I constructed
a brand new pair of misty
spectacles, and through
them I cant really see much
but you once more, and the smile
youve never worn 05/02/2006 Author's Note: All comments are really appreciated!
http://www.benevansphotography.com/poetry/poetry.html for Ben Evans' poetry and writing.
Posted on 05/02/2006
Copyright © 2024 Ben Evans
| Member Comments on this Poem |
| Posted by Gregory O'Neill on 11/29/06 at 11:53 PM Enjoyed this, thanks for the read! |
| Posted by Nadia Gilbert Kent on 09/02/07 at 12:47 AM This is going to sound kind of silly, but... you're being a fish-ist. There are all sorts of birds AND fish but you gave the bird a name, and poetically, it distracts from the piece. Also, I think it would read better if you found another word for "picked" in the third stanza because you say it twice (gathered, maybe?). I like the whole run-on sentence thing for the poem, but it could be longer and given a bit more punch if you talked more openly about the subtext that's already there. |
|
