I'm on a downward spiral
on the path of a guilt trip
numbing myself
with the empty pleasure of
the meaningless
Wish it was simple
To turn my back on temptation
Weakness -
aggravated by a misguided
sense of direction
self-defeating, self-destructive
But not yet defeated, not yet destroyed
Not yet lost...

Many times I turn away
Pretending to be blind
as an excuse to stray
Hoping to reverse the fruits
of the Tree of Knowledge
Ignorance - a shield
Against the pain of consequence
A shield I cannot bear
for my shoulders are loaded
with the weight of my sins
Each one of them a nail
driven into Your flesh
and every scream of agony
Became a prayer of salvation for me

12/31/2001

Author's Note: ...written on one of my darker days
"i once was lost...

Posted on 04/29/2006
Copyright © 2024 Tricia Marie Miel