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Long After

by Malika Bierstein

I want to love you
long after the sweat dries
and our beats resume their slow, eventual
pace, long after I’ve lifted
my head from your smooth brown chest,
candle wax long since hardened
in its respective puddles.
I want to feel your warmth
long after I’ve washed it away
and carried myself out
into the brisk, cold morning
into a sea of faces that don’t look at me
the way you do. When you tell me I’m the only one
you want, I want to feel it too, reach for you
in the dark instead of pushing you away
so far into the light that everyone can see
how vulnerable I really am, exposed
despite the tough exterior
that denies every man like a shield
latched on long after battle. I want to surrender
myself to a feeling that’s been gone
so long I wonder if it will ever
find its way back, wind around
this haphazard road like a drunken bird
in search of shelter. My heart
has grown tired of waiting. Shadowed
by the dying violet of another day
I pick myself up, dust
off my boots one more time
and go on inside, the familiar
creek of the opening door reminding
me to leave the front light on.

09/29/2005

Posted on 09/29/2005
Copyright © 2024 Malika Bierstein

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