I am so lost, so lost
I don’t know who I am or where I want to be
Every plan, every desire, gone like the ice
In the river outside my window

I am alone, no one
I know one but she is not alone, not my home
Every day, from now until then, under the bridge
Seven years married to my widow

I was not found, not there
Was never there to find, was never gone to drowned
Everywhere searched, every last stone turned under
But not in the river, I was lost

No one looked here, not here
I know for this is here, here is where I’m alive
Look for me, look under where you did not before
Find me, follow my river, I’m here

03/30/2005

Author's Note: Written after waking from an odd dream about being trapped under the ice in the river outside my window. I could see people walking over the ice above me, but I could not break through or get their attention. Finally, I found a hole in the ice under the nearby train bridge and escaped the freezing water. But when I got back to where I had seen the people walking on the ice, they were now under the ice and seemingly unaware of their predicament.

Posted on 09/26/2005
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