Finding Myself in the Midst of Womanhood by Shonda ChrissonberryIve yet to find comfort in my experience with womanhood.
It painfully bears the lonely existence of a single
Soul trying to grasp ~ and miss ~ frayed cords of love,
Mirrored only by a lack of what the world calls beauty.
Still, within this struggle, I forge on looking for strength
Achieving it by numerous means ~ the purest being faith.
When the dark moments come and I question that faith,
I find it impossible for me to see my expectation of womanhood
Without fear of what is or is not to be. I lean on the strength
Ive received from mentors, who are themselves still single.
Women who have found peace in their oneness. They seek beauty,
And capture it in various other forms of sought-after love.
From these amazing women, I am starting to learn that love
Must first come from within ~ and that without simple faith
In God, others, and myself ~ I will never see that woman of beauty
Created in His image, exemplified within my own womanhood,
Made real by the dreams that have found their way into my single
Heart ~ a heart desiring to build a future safe within its own strength.
Hopefully, if this life allows ~ I can share this gift of strength.
Walking beside my forevermate, hand to hand with a lasting love,
Packing up all those out of reach dreams, saying adios to my single
Years ~ Never forgetting those brave women who portrayed what faith
Truly is. If for some reason, this life does not allow my womanhood
To step beyond anything other than being one ~ I too will seek beauty.
In the summers sun, falls colors, winters snow, springs rebirth ~ beauty.
And in those quiet days, I will sit and ponder ~ drawing more strength
From within myself. Knowing that one day, I shall glow in my womanhood.
Taking in all the memories Ive ever made and recalling all the love
Ive ever received. Standing secure and unshakable in a binding faith,
With my Maker ~ the One who set me apart and christened me single.
I shall take it for what it is, a gift of life and not dwell upon being single.
I will look upon my reflection and smile. Knowing that beauty
Is only skin deep and my real splendor shines forth in my faith.
I will be as gentle as a kitten, never disregarding my lioness strength.
And perhaps the most important part of all is ~ I will indeed love ~ love
Like never before. And find satisfaction in this experience of womanhood.
Still, it takes extreme Faith for me to endure being Single.
It is a testament to my Womanhood and to the Beauty
Found only in the Strength and tender peace of Gods Love.
08/11/2005 Author's Note: submitted for the Women's contest ~ also my first attempt at a sestina
Posted on 08/12/2005 Copyright © 2025 Shonda Chrissonberry
|