A Cautionary Tail by Dave FitzgeraldAh, this little cute pet of mine,
Its silky fur smooth and fine,
Quite a long tail but tiny toes,
She likes it when I stroke her nose.
AND THEN
A carrot crunch of a bite,
A lightning flash of blinding light,
My finger taking quite a mauling,
Oh sickly feeling, quite appalling.
AND THEN
The little rat gripped me tightly,
And like a ferret with Richard Whitley,
Threw me about our front hall,
Like a massive power ball.
AND THEN
The vicious rodent spat me out,
The air turned blue as I began to shout,
I went to grab it as I got bolder,
But itd had my finger right to the shoulder.
SO
Take this as a cautionary tale,
Beware of cute pets without fail,
No matter how cute, theyre prone to slip,
Even Gerbils give a nasty nip.
08/01/2005
Author's Note: This happened... honestly! (Richard Whitley, British TV personality, sadly died earlier this year, Rest In Piece. The incident involving him and the ferret really happened... on TV. It should be noted that I wrote this well before he died and I'm sure he would've liked it.)
Posted on 08/01/2005 Copyright © 2025 Dave Fitzgerald
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