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A Cautionary Tail

by Dave Fitzgerald

Ah, this little cute pet of mine,
It’s silky fur smooth and fine,
Quite a long tail but tiny toes,
She likes it when I stroke her nose.

AND THEN…

A carrot crunch of a bite,
A lightning flash of blinding light,
My finger taking quite a mauling,
Oh sickly feeling, quite appalling.

AND THEN…

The little rat gripped me tightly,
And like a ferret with Richard Whitley,
Threw me about our front hall,
Like a massive power ball.

AND THEN…

The vicious rodent spat me out,
The air turned blue as I began to shout,
I went to grab it as I got bolder,
But it’d had my finger right to the shoulder.


SO…

Take this as a cautionary tale,
Beware of cute pets without fail,
No matter how cute, they’re prone to slip,
Even Gerbils give a nasty nip.


08/01/2005

Author's Note: This happened... honestly! (Richard Whitley, British TV personality, sadly died earlier this year, Rest In Piece. The incident involving him and the ferret really happened... on TV. It should be noted that I wrote this well before he died and I'm sure he would've liked it.)

Posted on 08/01/2005
Copyright © 2024 Dave Fitzgerald

Member Comments on this Poem
Posted by Maria Francesca on 06/20/08 at 01:56 PM

'Rest in Piece'?!...just how vicious was this ferret, anyway?...sounds a bit like my cat. Fun poem!

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