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ashes, ashes, we all fall down

by Angela Thomas

I feel like I have been spinning around in circles
for a very long time. My vision is skewed and I can't
place certain sounds. I have nothing to hold onto
to keep from falling down, so I just keep on

spinning and spinning. I dream sometimes,
sometimes about you, sometimes not about you,
but mostly, I lay in the dark at night and I try,
I try so hard to let myself cry, but instead

I just lay in my bed, dry and drunk. I date, or should
I say, play. I have turned into you, the ultimate
detached, unattached, hurtful player. You did
it to me and I'll do it to them. I try to explain

to the men that I date that, "I will never be with
you. I will never love you. You will never be my
boyfriend. I will leave you." So, they laugh
because they think I'm lying, but the sad

part is, it's all true. It's so much easier on this
side of coin, I just keep on flipping and no matter
what, I always win. I could spin forever, Ring around
the rosy, pockets full of posy. Ashes, ashes, we all
fall down.
We all fall down.

04/20/2005

Author's Note: more stream of consciousnes.

Posted on 04/21/2005
Copyright © 2023 Angela Thomas

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