Keep you on your toes.

you know me... right?
I used to live to write..
now I just live to work.

Maybe I just had the nuts kicked out of me too many times..
maybe I just gave up on trying to communicate with you
maybe I'd just rather hide in my mind's rhymes then expose myself to
mental abuse of how I think, who I hang out with, and what I drink.

Maybe pain isn’t something I want to share with the world?
maybe I’m not trying to impress some unknown girl.

I have to see your eyes, your smile
I have to want to hang out a while
I have to be honest with myself and you
and writing.. I just seem too untrue.

Poetry slips from my lips like liquor from a bottle
and when I live my life, I prefer it at full throttle
I don’t waste time in front of a monitor anymore
I find all this typing and bullshit to be such a bore.
I run around till late in the morning..
and come home in the middle of dark with no warning..
I parade like a lost soul convention at a limbo party
now I show up early when I always used to be tardy.
I've switched gears in my life, I can feel it so
and I hate to have to let those parts of me go...
But I can't sit around smoking pot all night
and wake up in the morning broke, feeling alright..
I have to go out and make that cash
since I can't make it here, writing on my ass..
So I guess I just take a hiatus
and try best and to forget about us
this writing relationship, this hobby of saints
since I guess, I like the picture my life paints.

i wish I had the time to spill all these matters to page
but time slips by too fast, In my old age..
I used to think I had all the time in the world
and into different situations, I've been hurled.
Responsibility seems to bid for more and more time
so I enjoy the moment's with my rum and lime.
I spent the hours wasting away in my prime
and now I look around and I don't have any time.
No time for you, hell, not even time for me
and now I see how hell can turn into reality.
I work all the time.. and I'm still in debt
and I wish I remebered the happy, but I tend to forget.
I try not and dwell on the bills next week
since it really feels like Im swimming in shit's creek.

I love my family, I love my friends..
but I guess it all comes down to a case of 'it depends'
You work away your life for just a spot to call home
and then wake up one day, dead.. and you're not alone.
I will you well my friends and foes
since I guess, here I am.. to keep you on your toes.

03/27/2005

Author's Note: I wrote this after feeling inspired by the 'capt'

Posted on 03/27/2005
Copyright © 2024 Aaron Howard