Leaving my first love
by Carl Walker
I had a love, i thought it was love in the seventh grade. Ellen, oh i was smitten. was that my first love?
later in the army
i was looking for sex and I thought it was love, until I found it for sale and sampled it. the bitterness of what I had done lingered a long time. I never wanted to confuse sex with love again.
was that my first love?
Later after the army i was lookin for life and thought love could give it
I was in love with the thought of being in love.
i think Debbie was too, we shared something, we shared our bodies, we shared our time, we shared some sorrows, we shared our thirst to each suck the life out of the other, we were both glad when we didn't share anything else. i din't never want to confuse loving love with love again, too painful
that wasn't my first love, was it.
i fell in love with jesu, and he gave me life. i didn't no longer seek love in sex or life in being in love. I met Patricia, we swam naked in a summer lake and shared friendship but not sex. we were friends for a long time and then she talked politics with me. it turned me on and we wed and shared a bed, for thirty years so far.
my first love was me, i loved myself more than any other. Patricia is teaching me to love jesu and jesu is love
i think my need is not to be taught love but to have love caught me
jesu, he do that so i can see
my first love for the false strumpet it am and to love some other more than I love myself.