I wish I could live with me
Or find someone else who could
I wish I could stop and be
Everything people say I should

Stop crying and move on
Live life unselfishly
Stop calling and be gone
Stop being so angry

Stop hiding from yourself
Try to be less of an enigma
Don't put your heart on the shelf
Live up to all the stigma
Of Christian perfectionism

Because as everyone knows
If I was a great guy
If I served others and was perfect
Then I could comply
And be the biggest jerk
The world has ever seen
But instead I am just angry
Unacceptable me

I wish to put my hand through glass
To fight someone and feel the pain
I want to smash this keyboard and computer
And trash most everything
But good people aren't like this
They are all controlled and fine
Whereas I am pissy and upset
I am at the end of the line

02/07/2004

Author's Note: old poem from a journal entry

Posted on 08/15/2004
Copyright © 2024 Oliver Drewman