The candidate says, Im a war hero.
The candidate says, that makes me better
than that other guy.
The candidate says, no matter that I threw away
my medals in protest,
no matter that I shouted out
against that immoral war.
Forget all that; now Im a war hero,
because that will make you vote for me.
The candidate says, I wont take us to war
unless I have to.
The candidate says, we must quash terror
at every turn, no matter what the cost.
The candidate says, excuse me a moment
while I wrap myself in the flag.
The candidate says, God bless
the United States of America.
The incumbent says, I served my country too,
sort of.
The incumbent says, Im still better
than that other guy.
The incumbent says, no matter that I usually look
like a deer in the headlights,
and have trouble stringing together
more than one articulate sentence.
Forget about that; Im your leader
I caught Saddam.
That will make you vote for me.
The incumbent says, forget the weapons
we never found, after striking
an imagined enemy, pre-emptively.
We must keep our presence there,
so our men and women wont have died in vain,
and to keep my Saudi friends happy.
The incumbent says, we must quash terror
at every turn, no matter what the cost.
The incumbent says, excuse me a moment
while I wrap myself in the flag.
The incumbent says, God bless
the United States of America.
The people say, not another forced choice.
The people say, God help
the United States of America.
