she's a pixie
in my memory

short
blonde
hair
big
blue
eyes

I can see her dancing
& I remember the way she smiled

her handwriting looked like mine
& I've kept every note she wrote

homework over the phone
& we shared our first cigarette

I can still see her t.e.a.r.s
that fell so regularly
on my mind
like a stain on a page

she reminded me how to feel

I don't know where she is
but if I know
Julie,
she's somewhere
loving
someone

12/07/2003

Author's Note: being near Julie made me feel robotic. me. the girl that can't pay for a coffee without tearing up. she cried at everything. she felt everything so deeply. I mean, we were in sixth grade... the boy who smiled at you was the big news... but she was real. I say she's somewhere loving someone because that was so natural to her. love. she taught me how to be more free with my love. and she reminded me that I wasn't perfect. do you know how big my head was when I was 11? and she said without saying, "hey, take a look around." and looking back I wish I would have treated her better. she deserved to be treated kindly, and I wasn't good enough to her.

Posted on 12/07/2003
Copyright © 2025 Emily G Myers