Home

over my dead soul

by Laura Doom

The disarray of yesterday
subsides into a sterile smile,
desire succumbs to sleepless dreams
seduction by serenity;
all cynicism sanitized
or so it seems.

Tomorrow undertakes today,
engaging matters so mundane
that clouds behind my eyes display
reflections of my earthly plane,
and though contentment lights my way
I kiss the hand that feeds me pain.

It's comforting
to know I'm not alone
in struggling to soar
on wings designed to serve
the humble drone
whose undivided loyalty
to nature's humdrum royalty
deserves the custom of his whore.

Unburdened by the vision
and the spiritual ecstacy
that enervates the fettered
as it elevates the free,
I dedicate myself
to mordant mediocrity.

Unbound, the resurrected seize
their passions, morbid mysteries
performed as rites before the eyes
of those in whom doubt multiplies
with each concession to disease,
desensitized beyond reprise.

The heavens open, poets pour, the souls-extraordinary fly
whilst I remain to exercise this flesh and blood-stained heresy
that disinfects deliverance, and sings in blissful ignorance
of pasts and futures way beyond the strictures of my pagan sky.

10/19/2003

Author's Note: [rags]

Posted on 10/19/2003
Copyright © 2020 Laura Doom

Member Comments on this Poem
Posted by Rachelle Howe on 10/26/03 at 01:07 PM

okay, see, i don't like the brackets. i think it draws away from the overall message and is terribly distracting. own it, don't hold back. :) besides, read it without the brackets, which is in essence what you're doing. "subsides into a smile" that makes *no* sense. so. own it. yes. also, "on wings designed to serve the humble drone" is twice as long as any of the other breaks. you could either break it after designed or serve, but... that's up to you. "or so it seems" from the first stanza could be taken out completely and you'd keep with the semi-pattern you've got, except for the two line stanza and the ending stanza also obliterate that. your flow and pattern are completely interupted there, but... :) overall, this has a lot of potential, and i think (especially since i didn't notice the rhyme at first, way kudos to you) you could do a lot with it.

Posted by Michele Schottelkorb on 12/07/03 at 08:02 AM

your pagan sky is inviting... excellent piece... blessings...

Return to the Previous Page
 

pathetic.org Version 7.3.2 May 2004 Terms and Conditions of Use 0 member(s) and 2 visitor(s) online
All works Copyright © 2020 their respective authors. Page Generated In 0 Second(s)