welcome, welcome
What can I do for you today
of course, of course
you want a little god today
well, you've come to the right place
now, did you want a god like you grew up with
or something totally different
if we don't have it in here
we have a shop out back
we can fabricate anything you want
what will it be
what will it be
What, oh no, no, no, no
don't pay attention to those old myths
god can be anything you want it to be
there's not one god
there's many paths to the same truth
we're all trying to get to the same place
aren't we
now, now, don't be shy
don't be shy
what do you want
what will you have
what, oh no, no, no, no
I told you before we make god in our own image
you can have a golden god
on a pedestal
or you can have a made up god
and it will say whatever you want it to say
but to think that there is only one real god
you must dismiss the notion
for it is both intolerant and odd
how could you know
which was the real god
stupid ignorant child
and what would give you confidence
after all, that you had the one real god
it would be easier for us all
if you would just pick one of these
here take this one for free
it's not like you expect god to really do anything for you
after all
do you?
you do
you expect something from god
you say you want god to do something for you
that you can't do yourself
foolish little person
only God could do that
Hmm, I'm beginning to see your point
so tell me
how will you know which is the real God
that is arguing in circles little grasshopper
you want God to do something for you
that you can't do on your own
you want proof
the only God you'll take
is the one that proves to be God
dear child, almost no one puts demands like that on God
What, what is that you want
how will God prove himself to you
you insignificant flea
well, that's absurd
why would anyone want to do that anyway
I admit loving your enemies may look attractive
in a naive sort of way
but no one can really do that anyway
I mean, not really love them
Oh
that's why it would be proof
yes I suppose that would be some proof
if God could change your heart
what, you are saying you want more proof,
what more could you possibly want
a clear standard of behavior
so you could know how to live
well, dear, that's why we have psychology
well of course psychology changes
we don't stay in the same outmoded morality forever
people change, times change, behavior changes
huh, you think God doesn't change
well that really is too much
you'll never find a clear standard of behavior
presented in a way that only a real God could do
that survives the march of time
and the vicissitudes of changing culture
God would have to come down here
and walk around
God would have to let us know He was coming
He'd have to write a freaking book
in such a way that man couldn't write
He'd have to foretell the future
He'd have to have the greatest expression of love
nope, nope
it'll never happen
no we don't have anything like that anywhere around here
if you ever find it let me know
and I'll change gods too
but right now how about leaving my store
sheesh, I'm glad that twerp is gone
he thinks that there is some real God out there
who has an actual identity
he just doesn't get it
we make god in our image
we couldn't possibly conform ourselves
to God anyway