The Epic of Milton by D. Xavier BariPublic Class frmBeingMiltonWaddams
Inherits System.Windows.Forms.Form
'TPS Report Format Checker
'Copyright 1999, Initech Corporation
#Region " Declarations "
Private Const MSGMUMBLES As String = "Mumbling..."
Private Const MSGACTION As String = "That's the last straw."
Private Const MSGENVELOPE As String = "TRAVELER'S CHECKS"
#End Region
Private Sub cboDailyGrind_SelectedIndexChanged(ByVal sender As Object, ByVal e As System.EventArgs) Handles cboDailyGrind.SelectedIndexChanged
If Me.chkFlashPoint.Checked = True Then
Me.ThinkingLikeMilton(Me.MSGENVELOPE)
Else
Me.ThinkingLikeMilton("Insult")
End If
End Sub
Private Sub ThinkingLikeMilton(ByVal straw As String)
Dim seedPhrase As Integer
seedPhrase = CInt(Int((3 * Rnd()) + 1)) ' Generate random value
If (straw <> "TRAVELER'S CHECKS") Then
Select Case seedPhrase
Case 1
MessageBox.Show("I really want my red stapler back please...", Me.MSGMUMBLES)
Case 2
MessageBox.Show("I've moved my desk five times already...", Me.MSGMUMBLES)
Case 3
MessageBox.Show("I'll just...burn down the building...", Me.MSGMUMBLES)
End Select
Else
MessageBox.Show("FIRE! FIRE FIRE! HEH HEH HUHH HUH! FIRE!", Me.MSGACTION)
End If
End Sub
#Region " Windows Form Designer generated code "
Public Sub New()
MyBase.New()
'This call is required by the Windows Form Designer.
InitializeComponent()
'Add any initialization after the InitializeComponent() call
End Sub
'Form overrides dispose to clean up the component list.
Protected Overloads Overrides Sub Dispose(ByVal disposing As Boolean)
If disposing Then
If Not (components Is Nothing) Then
components.Dispose()
End If
End If
MyBase.Dispose(disposing)
End Sub
'Required by the Windows Form Designer
Private components As System.ComponentModel.IContainer
'NOTE: The following procedure is required by the Windows Form Designer
'It can be modified using the Windows Form Designer.
'Do not modify it using the code editor.
Friend WithEvents cboDailyGrind As System.Windows.Forms.ComboBox
Friend WithEvents chkFlashPoint As System.Windows.Forms.CheckBox
Friend WithEvents lblInputDG As System.Windows.Forms.Label
Private Sub InitializeComponent()
Me.cboDailyGrind = New System.Windows.Forms.ComboBox()
Me.chkFlashPoint = New System.Windows.Forms.CheckBox()
Me.lblInputDG = New System.Windows.Forms.Label()
Me.SuspendLayout()
'
'cboDailyGrind
'
Me.cboDailyGrind.DropDownStyle = System.Windows.Forms.ComboBoxStyle.DropDownList
Me.cboDailyGrind.Items.AddRange(New Object() {"", "Ummm, yeah, could youuu move your desk as close to the back as possible?", "Ummm, yeah, could youuu move your desk to the storage room downstairs?", "Ummm, yeah, that's great.", "Ummm, I think I'll just take this stapler here. Thanks.", "Ummm, you'll want to check with payroll on that. Yeah.", "Ummm, oh, Hawaiian shirt day is next Friday."})
Me.cboDailyGrind.Location = New System.Drawing.Point(54, 9)
Me.cboDailyGrind.MaxDropDownItems = 7
Me.cboDailyGrind.Name = "cboDailyGrind"
Me.cboDailyGrind.Size = New System.Drawing.Size(405, 21)
Me.cboDailyGrind.TabIndex = 0
'
'chkFlashPoint
'
Me.chkFlashPoint.Location = New System.Drawing.Point(132, 33)
Me.chkFlashPoint.Name = "chkFlashPoint"
Me.chkFlashPoint.Size = New System.Drawing.Size(219, 24)
Me.chkFlashPoint.TabIndex = 1
Me.chkFlashPoint.Text = "Find envelope under Lumbergh's door."
'
'lblInputDG
'
Me.lblInputDG.Location = New System.Drawing.Point(12, 12)
Me.lblInputDG.Name = "lblInputDG"
Me.lblInputDG.Size = New System.Drawing.Size(48, 16)
Me.lblInputDG.TabIndex = 2
Me.lblInputDG.Text = "INPUT:"
'
'frmBeingMiltonWaddams
'
Me.AutoScaleBaseSize = New System.Drawing.Size(5, 13)
Me.ClientSize = New System.Drawing.Size(508, 69)
vMe.Controls.AddRange(New System.Windows.Forms.Control() {Me.chkFlashPoint, Me.cboDailyGrind, Me.lblInputDG})
Me.Name = "frmBeingMiltonWaddams"
Me.StartPosition = System.Windows.Forms.FormStartPosition.CenterScreen
Me.Text = "Being Milton Waddams "
Me.ResumeLayout(False)
End Sub
#End Region
End Class
09/21/2003 Posted on 09/21/2003 Copyright © 2025 D. Xavier Bari
Member Comments on this Poem |
Posted by Jolie Jordan on 09/23/03 at 09:50 AM Office space is a great movie.. and this? what can I say. its brilliantly original;) |
Posted by Max Bouillet on 09/24/03 at 06:39 PM I think it's brilliant. I can't be sure though. My coding is different than yours... and I guess my reboots take longer, too. And, uh, well I guess that's all I have to say about that. |
Posted by Kourosh Taheri-Golvarzi on 05/18/05 at 02:36 AM wwwoooooowwwww poetry in Visual Basic... bastard, I wanted to do that! :D well-done, man! I'm glad I was beaten by a true professional! |
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