Addiction (****) V.2.28.02 by Aaron HowardAddiction 2-28-02
I feel those teeth gripping onto my spine.
A feeling that is known as truly mine.
I feel the tinge of hunger pulling at my stomach.
I feel the pain, my gut in a knot, tight as a rock.
I feed the need that thrives and drives me
This junkie paradise in my own reality.
This one point
This addiction
Maybe, in a joint or someones affliction.
Addiction, such a word with no real meaning to what it could stand for.
So Ive come up with a meaning that might help explain addiction a little more.
A
For the absence of fear
The absence of any possible message clear.
You lose fear when you know its something you love, something youre addicted to.
You lose fear of life and death when you find out something pure and true,
Your addiction happiness always to be there for you
Your addiction the fragile frame to which you adhere to like glue.
Be it a person, a drug, a sexual deviant, or a favorite food.
Be it in something that ups, downs or just puts you in the mood.
D
For Direction
For which it leads you
In which it bleeds you
After all, it is yours alone and it will consume you alone, drive you
For the rise and fall, the glass wall phone, with your tender moments left few.
The whites with your name on the bottom, the cellblock your from
the pumpkin suit in which you live, this direction you had to give.
D
For Disgust.
Which is how people see you when you admit youre addicted
For how they look at you while youre being forcefully evicted.
It always sounds like such a bad thing.
The need play guitar or the need to sing.
Too bad, everyone is addicted to something.
No matter the cost or the despairs it might bring.
Be it in their TV, or in their frozen dinner.
Be it in their bible and title of being a non-sinner.
The sparkle of light in the eyes of your daughter.
In the hours of hearing your childrens laughter.
I
for Me
Me Here
You there
Me clear.
You dont care.
Me addicted,
You afflicted
You with your moral standpoint
Me, with my proverbial joint.
Mes stays heres, yous go over theres,
No one ever worries, No one ever cares
Out of sight out of mind
so stare yourself denial blind.
C
for Cost
On what other people cost and charge for your addiction
To lend a helping hand in line for your affliction
Be it love, money or supreme power
Be it in the morning whisky and sour
Still on this very day
We still fist over hand pay.
We dont know the real cost,
Since there are so many lost.
Its always a multi faceted addiction...
Its something that depends on you confliction.
Its makes you happy, yet it displeases others
It might be in the hours just spent being mothers.
Be it your lover, your friend or your government.
Be it in your day off, late night hours creatively spent.
T
For Time
Your addiction is a test of time
Sometimes involves doing a crime.
How much do you love your children?
How much do you love your sin?
How much do you love your drugs?
How much do you love your frosty mugs?
Are they going to be with you forever?
Will they ever say no, never?
Is your favorite dinner going to be there for you when youre old?
Is your favorite lifestyle here and now, or have you been oversold?
I...For internal
All those dreams and lies we hold.
All the bullshit lines we once got sold.
Telling us its not your fault.
Keeping the internal locked vault.
Its someone elses, not yours
Be it in your nightly twelve of Coors.
The internal pain that the government causes when they forbid you from your addiction.
Be it in a joint
youre midnight snacks, your favorite soap
your gun collection
Seeing your child in another state.
Finding out the facts way too late
When the ex wife has a restraining order against you.
When life turns out to be painfully destined to be too true
O
For Obsess
All those intruding thoughts about your addiction
All those intruding morals on your personal conviction
How they drive your mind in circles, just one more laugh, one more moment of bliss.
Just one more moment of life that will come and go, and I can come to miss.
N
For Nature
As in the true nature of this additictioned beast.
As in the proverbial nature on which we feast.
We know our addiction, we know it all to well.
Weve come to embrace it, in this lifelong hell.
Weve settled our scores and opened our mind
Living through the unkind leading the blind.
Addiction
whats all the fuss?
Its in the heart of each of us.
09/01/2003 Author's Note: I wrote this in the mindset that everyone is addicted to something or another...
Posted on 09/01/2003 Copyright © 2024 Aaron Howard
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