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Grey People #1 (short story)

by Beth K Hannah

I went on a voyage to visit the Grey people. It was entertaining to say the least. Not as offensive as the Red people, but still no sticklers for political correctness. At least there were no talks of kitchens. So, I went and talked to Lou, their 8th in command.

Me: Hello...Lou, isn't?

Lou: What the hell? Don't you have any manners? Christ?

Me: Sorry...

Lou: It's one of my personalities, Steve. He was staring at your chest.

Me: Oh. That's great. I think. Well I just have a few questions to ask you.

Lou: Okay. Shoot. Not literally of course, I know how you are.

Me: (rolls eyes) How do you feel about the recent formation of Hell?

Lou: Well, this "Hell" is the place that I think the poor shall enjoy. I've heard the government and world leaders are giving out all the land and such to the non wealthy. What are us wealthy folks suppose to do? They give the good land and good schools to the poor and leave us obnoxiously rich folk stuck in some desert called Heaven. I think it absurd!

Me: Me too.

Lou: And I even heard they are forming their own religon in Hell. They want to build churches and renounce thier ties to the Church of Barbra.

Me: Well it happens....Sometimes people find thier own faith.

Lou: It isn't fair. Damn Jews.....i think they should have just wiped the Germans out and got it over with. Christ steve...she doesn't want to sleep with you! Stop bothering me, it pisses me off!

Me: The Jews killed the Germans?

Lou: Haven't you ever been to Jewland? All the kosher you could want with none of the ridiculous prices. Those Jews sure do like thier low prices and insane amounts of kosher.

Me: I will have to look into that.....So, do you like having 2 personalities?

Lou: No, not really. See, I am a fighter while steve, well he is just a pervert. It can make conversations a little difficult at times....especially when Steve gets on a kick and has to recite every line from Office Space.

Me: Really...that is spectacular.

Then Lou leaps up and throws himself onto the ground, kicking and screaming to himself. An oddly familiar voice yells,"Lou.....you don't know where I have been for the last six years....I mean very few could live in the playboy mansion when they have no money."

Then Lou sits back down and apoligizes.

Me: that is alright, those double personalities will get you every time. Well, I think I have enough for now. Thank you.

Lou: No problem.

Okay, I know. Another predicitable plot, especially with a character named Lou. But, what can I say. The movie has warped my fragile little mind.

08/04/2003

Author's Note: This is episode 2 of the second season.

Posted on 08/05/2003
Copyright © 2024 Beth K Hannah

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