Words confused
slowly moving
in my head.
I hurt deep.
I just want happiness.
I'm not sure why.
But what is happiness?
Freedom?
Solitude?
Loneliness?
It seems to elude me
at ever turn of my life.
I know what is coming,
that feeling
deep in my head.
I am sinking in it,
I am familiar with it.
Again I fight the deep abyss
That monster grabs me
from within
pulls me down.
I fight
never relaxing.

05/22/2003