It's done.
I did it.
I succeeded in hearing your tears
for the first time
ever.
13 months
and it took this moment
for you to see any of it.
GOD DAMMIT!
If you had just watched when I told you I loved you
back when I meant all three words
this mightn't of happened
but it has
and it did
and I'm so in love with someone
who isn't you
and I'm so so so sorry
I tried to get it across
before it came to this
and came to him
and her
oh fuck I never meant to hurt her either
god, she doesn't deserve any of it
and you just never saw it coming
no matter how I tried to show you
why do you still love me?
why are you both
so insanely in love?
I'm so sorry
I've hurt you both.
Geordie, I love you
But I can't play pretend
anymore.
I can't just wait
for a change
never ever
it didn't come,
though I waited for you
and I dreamed of it all
when everything was beautiful.
Do I want you to go on?
Do I want you not to love me?
Yes.
Don't love me
I don't deserve you today.

04/28/2003

Author's Note: Hun, it isn't just your fault. Don't ever just blame yourself.

Posted on 04/29/2003
Copyright © 2024 Trisha De Gracia