he tells her things change, that
time knows no difference between
sleep and awake. and the hole that
grows inside of her was not deepened
by him, but rather, from her inability to
say no to anyone who wants in.

and every other day she has a speech
prepared, a fancy creation all her own
to yell at him with, to make him know
that time does know difference between
sleep and awake and that her entire life
has not been one big mistake, that yes,
there were others that she let into her
world but they were only boys and she is
just a girl and she wanted to love them,
she tried desperately but some things, darling
no matter how you rub them they just can't
be but that's all history that's what brought
her here.
and in her daydream, every other day this is
when he draws her near and says that he
understands, that he would never be one of those
boys with such empty hands. and yes, in her
daydreams, he and she learn to love again.

but this isn't a dream of any kind and he's close
enough to smell and she can't speak at all for
fear she will yell and then slowly she feels the
change in the air as she notices he's closer,
just standing there next to her, the want for
reconciliation, the need for a change of pace
written all over his shadow puppet face and
she feels herself falling all over the place
but she can only laugh aloud
like she knows him.

04/10/2003

Author's Note: ahhh, those dreadful ghosts again

Posted on 04/11/2003
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