Painful & willing
You clamber up the scattered staircase
The rush of marvel fills your head
as you notice the blood-stained ceiling
~clots of black are cascading down
You push your way through the iron door
as memories drift back
the sense of nostalgia hot in your mind
What was that?
that sound you heard
coming from above the molasses ceiling...
(boom, bang, crash)
Shaking your head, you move on,
closer & closer to the screaming desire
The iron door slams behind you
&
for a moment,
Visions of lollipops dance in your head
& Life is as before
(boom, bang, crash)
Reality swims back in
You trudge on & on
through the brown muck collecting on the floor
as the noise bellows on with rage
Then, suddenly~red
Everywhere is red; burning, hot, red
Points & spikes emerge from below crusty
surfaces
& screams of pain & desire collide as one
Surges of emotion plummet throughout your
veins
as your fingers beg forgiveness
Oh, but it's too late~much too late
(We're sorry, but this is your destination)
You walk to the end of the line
Wrists, still stained & torn & scarred
are bursting once again
Behold, the Great One
on his throne of coals & rocks
His spear, with a triple-forked tongue held upright
~between his long, blistered claws
Nails of pure black, puncture your side
slitting open the meaty flesh
The blood runs thick down your tendons
& the Great One roars with laughter
~evil wicked laughter
Gouging deeper & deeper
'til your heart is screaming in mortified pain
You claw & rip at the Great One's eyes~
to no avail
~the laughter again
(boom, bang, crash)
Farther down
You're sinking into Nothingness
No forgiveness~no care~no...no...no...NO!

Welcome~
this is Hell

09/26/1990

Author's Note: my ancient perception of what would happen were i to take my own life... i no longer believe there is a devil... but at the time, "it" was very real...

Posted on 03/22/2003
Copyright © 2025 Michele Schottelkorb