they said
time will tell
but i called him and he said
he isn't telling anything,
that if anyone asks he has
retired and moved to bermuda
(time does have a wife and kids,
ya know, along with his own busy
schedule to keep up with)
so i asked them again
and they said,
perhaps it is written in the stars.
well, i sent a letter five days
ago but those bastards must not
have anything to write because
i still haven't received any mail
from them and i'm sure if they
ever do send something my way
it will be laced with excuses about
clouds and thunderstorms.
they said, well maybe you should
consult a psychic but the one i had
in mind saw me coming from a mile
away, packed up and left town.
ok then.
one more time i asked them
and they said maybe if i looked
within myself, i would find the answer.
so all day i have been steadily searching
between every nook and cranny,
in and around my heart and other vital
organs. picking away at my brain
opening doors i had closed forever ago
and startling my memory awake.
and all i've seemed to find is a headache
and some heartburn (also a liver that
could use some damage control but
nevermind that...) anyway nothing of
any use to me although i did manage
to re-acquire some old habits i had
carefully hid away. nice.
but no answers.
not a single one.
look, all i wanted to know is if
anything would ever be worth it or if
i should toss my hand in now.
is that really so hard of a question.
i guess i'll try calling God and ask him.

figures.



he isn't answering.

02/08/2003

Author's Note: in a weird mood i guess...just some rambling... will most likely delete eventually.

Posted on 02/09/2003
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