Fourth grade was an incorrigible year for me

at least when clothing was concerned

Old enough to care about my garb

but not old enough

(at least to my mother)

to have much of a say in the matter.

From Polly's she bought me these hideous pants

Hammer would have loved them

ballooned and poufy

turquoise stripes and hot pink roses

kissing the pantlegs pleated pouf.

Ah, but of course, I'd need shoes

to wear with my pretty (pretty ugly) pants

And with my dad being friend's

with ol' Carl Perkins,

("Namedropper"...Who me?)

and us, only minutes from his hometown

What better for me to have

than some lovely blue suede shoes

Hideous shoes with some 50's flapper fringe

what purpose did it serve?

They stood out enough already.

Bright turquoise shoes need no further embellishment.

I couldn't really do much about the pants,

but you'd damn well better believe I'd ditch the shoes

I hid them, where my granny kept her old magazines.

And my plan worked

Moma looked for my shoes

scolded me for losing them

but ultimately forgot about it.

Back to my plain white Keds now

mercifully so...

Then she decided she wanted to read up

on Woman's World or something

a she found my suede shame

Fortunately

My feet had grown to big for them

(as a subconscious plan B perhaps)

I hope I didn't scar Jessica too bad.

Maybe my sister can forgive me.

Moma made her wear them

Oddly enough, I have some red suede boots now

I don't wear them...

Can't find the matching Hammer-pants.

02/03/2003

Author's Note: I know it's not worth a fliying flip, but I had to get in on the Red Suede Boot action. And, it's a true story.

Posted on 02/03/2003
Copyright © 2025 Melina Raven Maness Diebold