i wish sometimes
that i didn't always find it so necessary
to have words to give to you.
that i could for once, keep myself
hushed and gathered,
these senses.
i only die ya know, breaking off
pieces of myself to throw at you.
faltered and fumbling
and i slip up again.
you warn me you won't catch me
but then you do
and i only grow more scattered.
breadcrumbs to be reckoned with.
i need to learn to stay still.
hushed and gathered,
these senses.
when will you stop spinning or is that
me, this room, odd behavior
and we become even stranger bedfellows
than before.
you keep me in line by stealing my breath
and we both know how hard it is for me
to keep quiet.
so much better at saying too much too fast.
insert foot into mouth: again & again.
i need to learn to stay still.
hushed and gathered,
these senses.
if only i didn't always find it so necessary
to have words to give to you.
if only you would consider listening
to me for once.
somehow, somewhere
we're bound to break even.
eventually.

01/28/2003

Posted on 01/29/2003
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