i could not keep you in my mouth.

everywhere it's raining down on
our parade and i can not hold
your hand anymore to keep from
stumbling. this is a powerful
pill you're afraid to swallow
but i bring it into myself,
-impatiently, aggressively-
the same as i brought you into
myself too many moons ago.
my tendency to pull towards/
push away has brought the roof
down on our tempermental existence
and i don't bother explaining
myself anymore. it never was
too much about perspective no
matter which way we looked at it,
at eachother. it always came out
the same. so i swallow this
whole and later, perhaps, i'll
learn regret all over again and
send all of this into the toilet,
vomiting out everything i once
knew about us & what we could be,
that powerful pill
that you were always so afraid to
swallow.

01/04/2003

Posted on 01/05/2003
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