i am;
clumsy & soiled

(you knew you wouldn't catch me
so you didn't bother trying.)

if you were a metophoric-charmer
perhaps you would vomit upon me
that i was only an eclipse who sought
to drown out the intensity of yoursun.

but you could never be that.
never grow to be that even with time
& dramas & your mother's cooking, homestyle
(just the way you like it)
but you will never.
and i thank your god for that for mine is
toasted and sleeping off last night's curses
and my secret death.

you are;
well, you;
just Are.

and i;
am choking on promises and crooked dealings
of fate and time and distance and cards.

and fighting,
fighting with the fact that you just Are
and that is what you will always be.

12/18/2002

Author's Note: -very rough draft-

Posted on 12/19/2002
Copyright © 2025 Olivia Weinkein