Selfish in my own head.

need to clear my head,
not sure if its
troubled love
or troubled self
living in fear
of my own paranoia
uncertainty looms
across the room.
anticipating the moment
i grab my keys and bolt
for a far off place, that
only loneliness knows.

Wandering with a wounded heart
pursuing a face encased by memories
fleeing the inevitable truth
chasing old dreams hidden in sleep.

Exhausting the self,
worrying friends,
collapse, let go,
give in,
to the monsters within.

10/13/2002