alive

i was, tonight
in the on-again-off again
yo-yo pull of
faces
music
bass
beat
and drunks ordering
one more drink

alive.
it was, tonight
your telltale envy
greener than a
miracle grow tended lawn
birthed by the
on-again-off-again
yo-yo pull
of us
then
now
heated tongues,
cold acceptance
and leering women.

i could have sworn
you wanted to rip
out their lust and claw
misguided eyes
only to swallow me
yourself
(not those devils!)
like the multicolored pills
i keep by my bed
(drugs alive only
in an acidic stomach)

and you are only alive
tonight
in the rhythm of the
speakers
memories and
thoughts
you don't act out and
words you
wish i'd say.

05/27/2002

Posted on 05/27/2002
Copyright © 2025 Rachelle Howe