It's 2 am...
I need to talk to you...
You don't know how tempted I am to knock on your door and spill everything to you...
I feel like I'm losing you...in every aspect...
We are BEST friends...I love everything about you and always will.
It's just that things are changing now...changing much too rapidly for me to accept.
You are graduating in eleven months.
I still have another two years...
I just feel as if I'm behind...and obviously there is no way I can stop this...but you are moving on without me...
You will be married within two years...probably before I graduate...
I guess what scares me the most is that I know, after graduation...you won't need me anymore (at least not as much)...
But I'll still need you...
We became friends because we had so much in common...
We had the same views on things and we agreed on almost everything...
But now...I feel as if we are moving in two different directions... two different paths...
It makes me sad...
It makes me sad to know that when we go home next Christmas break...I won't be returning with you
It makes me sad to know that I won't have you right next door to me anymore...
I won't have the opportunity to sit here at my computer at 2 am seriously thinking about waking you up "just to talk"...
Lately we don't seem like us anymore...
We have arguments almost every day (we never fought before...only two fights in the three years we've known each other)
The things we used to joke around about and have fun with...well you don't seem quite as interested anymore...
I know you are growing up...I know you have to learn to accept the fact that you are going out into the real world very soon...and I know that scares you to death...
But I also know...you can do it...You will do it. You will survive. You are strong, beautiful, intelligent person...with so many ideas and things to offer this sad world of ours.
You will live a happy life with G and maybe (just maybe) you'll have children.
Remember when you used to tell me I'd be your nanny...?
I ask one thing of you when you leave Kristin...please do not forget me...
Please remember that no matter what happens in the future...I will always be here for you...
It doesn't matter to me if we become completely opposite people.
It doesn't matter to me if we are two different religions...have different views on race, sexual orientation, etc...
It doesn't matter to me...because the images of you I will have stuck in my mind will be the images of us...during the last three years...
The times when finding "hot" professors was our idea of fun
The times when we'd sit in that one corner of the hallway during freshman year just to talk...
The times when we'd stay up until all hours of the morning talking about our little infatuations with whomever it happened to be at the time...
The time you told me that I was your best friend and that you would never be able to get married without me there...
See Kristin...this is my way of showing you I still care...
This is my way of letting you know...that no matter what happens...I'll always make time for you...
This is my ode to you...
My BEST FRIEND...

01/23/2002

Posted on 01/23/2002
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