1

beautiful couple over there
getting together for dinner afrer a movie, maybe
I don't want sugar in my coffee tonight
the bitterness matches better to
everything
I don't want to taste sweetness
I want to taste you, instead
the pretty, pretty couple
needs more time to order
to decide what they want to order
they've been talking and laughing too much
waitress?
take this coffee back
and bring me the vilest
darkest, strongest
cup of coffee-reject you can find
bring me the worst cup of coffee
I've ever tasted
just so I can remember what bad is

2

I'm sick of everything tasting good
beautiful couple
covered in golden necklaces and watches and rings
you doodle on your napkin
as you wait for her to return from the bathroom
or write profound poems and prose
that extolls her virtues
but will she come back?
your ice cream has finally arrived
but she hasn't
waitress this coffee is still too good
I still don't mind drinking it
I can still tolerate the flavor
I'm still not compelled to
throw it on the ground in disgust
bring me a new one
and get it right this time

3

an old song plays on the radio
a song I've heard a thousand times with you
but this song is not you
it does not know you exist
it does not know your thoughts
it has never met you before
its words are not your words
its music is not your music
and no matter how many times
I listen to it
over and over again
it's not you
and I'm still alone

4

waitress
if I were to ask you to describe coffee
in three words, what would they be?
what about in haiku form?
cream, but no sugar
artificial energy
caffiene is so great
do you ever feel like talking for hours
with someone you've never met before?
someone with whom you have to
communicate superficially
because you don't know
where they are deep
but no one makes eye contact
everyone takes great lengths
to ignore you
just because they don't know your name

5

I remember a time
or think I remember a time
when coffee was sixty cents
now it's twice as much
well, at least the refills are free
give me another one
I don't feel like sleeping tonight
give me something that will
keep my dreams away
maybe I'm afraid
that if I go to bed
if I rest long enough
in the same spot
it will give my demons
a chance to find me
fi
nd

e
m

6

I remember the way
used
your words to
the page
flow across
like tear
s
on a suicide
note

thoughts
trails off
lost and wandering further down
the second path
blindly stumbling through randomness
words flicker like a television
late at night
I catch glimpses
my mind has become pay-per-view

7

and I'm a lonely adolescent virgin
staying up late trying to see
a vagina for the first time
through all the noise and
scrambled signal
change the channel
there was something there a minute ago
but that section of my mind
has followed the general trend
and gone blank
waitress, give me another cup of coffee
no, I'm cutting you off, buddy,
you've had too much already
driving while incaffinated

8

the songs haven't begun to repeat yet
I guess I haven't been here two hours
soon though
I could go home
but at least there are people here
people I can watch
who will remind me
that not everyone is deserving
of my misanthropy
people arrive and leave again
and I'm still here
watching
because it's Sunday night
and I've got nothing to do

9

children don't have school
tomorrow
but I do, as the rest of
the world rememvers all the
boys sent to die
by men too rich to have
been drafted
so everyone I know is busy working
getting homework done so they
can keep doing homework
here I sit
and
writing meaningless words
and imbibing poison
waitress' response:
my life (that's two words,
but I'll accept it)

10

addicting and . . .
ooh, I can't think of something
else
I'll think about it and get
back to you
what's haiku form mean?
that's something we learned
like 5 years ago, right?
vital would work as a
substitute for "my life"
I think
since we're looking for
three words, not phrases
maybe phrases would be fine
I think I'll tell her that

11

"We have all your hoiday gift
giving all wrapped up"
who gives Friendly's gift certificates
for Christmas?
the caffeine is kicking in
I love this stuff
but I'll hate it later
when I suddenly lose
all of this temporary vibrancy

- can't live without it

11/12/2001

Posted on 11/12/2001
Copyright © 2024 Gary Hoffmann