bony, I can see my veins
beneath my skin
as I clutch the bottle
tightly, so I don't lose it
drop it
as I did you

the knuckles are too large
from having cracked them
all my life
the fingernails are too short
from having chewed them down
again and again
in nervousness, fear, anxiety,
boredom
the tendons show when I clench my fist
made strong from years of practice
I see the countless scars
from when I've scratched
until I've bled
because anger is soothed
by the sight of life
lost

the ring you gave me
still wraps itself
too loose
around my finger
the same finger you put it around
so many years ago

I look at my hands
that once touched your face
that once loved you
that once held the world
as your gift
and realize
these are the same hands
that brought pain to so many
that have made weak men weep
and Zion bleed

I hate these hands
these ugly hands
bringers of death
so empty now
that bled for you

09/23/2001

Posted on 09/23/2001
Copyright © 2024 Gary Hoffmann