Abusing myself
With self hatred
Dominance
Submissiveness
Deception

Living in ruin
Around me
Surrounding me

Non-existing with Co-existence
Commuting to and from
What's inside

Screaming
and
Screaming
and
Screaming
and
Reaching

I can't find you anymore
In the herd of cattle
Prodded to be branded
Who they are
For who they are
Not who they wanted to be
But into the mold they were cast
Each cast
Within it's own
From those who created
By the creator

I want to feel alive
With you
Without you
Hating you
I want to breathe
Without struggling
Without
Trying to drown me

I dream awake at night
Imagining I'm looking
Down
Below
Watching hoardes of ants
Commit to their daily tasks
Carryling loads to and from
Their individual homes

There's no point to this mindless rambling
That's all it really is

Mindless
Rambling
About who I think I am
Or was
Or what I could have been
Or who I can be
Or
Nothing

09/23/2001

Posted on 09/23/2001
Copyright © 2024 Stephanie Myers