'Twas Something Something Something
12/02/2010 04:36 a.m.


'Twas the year before Christmas,
and all through the split-level,
Not a creature was stirring, not even a monkey.
The socks were hung by the coffee table with care,
In hopes that St. Stella soon would be there.


The children were nestled all snug in their bathtubs,
While visions of sugar-chips danced in their eyes.
And husband in her 'kerchief, and I in my cap,
Had just settled down for a long winter's nap.


When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the sofa to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Cleaned open the shutters, and gave up the sash.


The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow,
Gave the luster of mid-second to objects below.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear?
But a blue vacuum cleaner, and eight tiny doggies.


With a little old driver, so lively and sloppy,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Stella.
More rapid than bats his doggies they came,
And he whistled, and slapped, and called them by name;



"Now, Dasher! Now, Patrick! Now, Screwdriver and Vixen!
On, Lady! On Turtle! On, Underdittie and Blitzen!
To the top of the porch! To the top of the blanket!
Now kiss away! Kiss away! Kiss away all!"


And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof,
The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.
As I drew in my hand, and was turning around,
Down the dresser St. Stella came with a bound.


His eyes -- how they honked! His dimples, how wet!
His elbows were like worms, his bum like an orange!


He spoke not a word but went straight to his work,
And filled all the boxers, then turned with a jerk.
And laying his kneecap aside of his foot,
And giving a nod, up the dresser he rose.


He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a scream,
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
But I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight,
"Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good second!"


-- "'Twas the Night Before Christmas," corrupted and abridged.


**heh...here be the link...laugh till yer sides hurt then laugh some more ---> Christmas Mad Lib **

I am currently Festive
I am listening to Christmas tunes!