I have to do something
10/19/2001 03:12 p.m.
I'm sorry everyone, on pathetic and otherwise, for the most part. I have been posting on here like a fiend, not giving anyone else any face time. I'm not gonna post anymore for awhile.
I don't have the energy anymore.
There is nothing left for me anymore, I can feel it. My best friend has gone to Detroit for awhile, and its already hard for me. I got so mad the day I last saw him, I punched a truck topper about 100 times. I was mad he was leaving, I was mad she left, I was mad she (they) lied, and I'm mad that I can't bear it any longer.
I've tried to talk about it, but it doesn't make me feel any better. I thought I was getting better, in my Depression, but I have only been lying. I want to be better, so I don't have to be so sad and lonely, but it doesn't matter anymore.
I don't think I'm going to last much longer like this.
I just want them to know, I still love them, I just don't want to because it reminds me of how much they hurt me. I say all these strong words, and try to seem like I'm okay with it, but I'm not.
I am hurting right now, more then I have ever hurt in all my life. I don't even know what to do, but I have to do something.
I am currently Sad