with one foot up
08/11/2002 06:00 p.m.
so much inspiration today. it hardly feels like a sunday. especially a sunday before everything starts spinning again. good timing is a blessing i havent experienced in a while. i wish i could master the art of that, or the art of anything for that matter. i talked to him again today. he reminded me that he said he was going to call, like i'd forget. funny boy.. wow, memories are large in number with him. he did that on purpose. everyone wants everyone to remember them, he's succeeded. i think cyndis mad at me because i want to go to communion this friday as opposed to a talent search thing at some steakhouse. i mean, i could use a hundred dollars, but i could use a right relationship with my God right now. that confirms it. she just called, and her tone when she said "bye" screamed--i'm angry but not saying anything. i hate that tone. oh the beauty of knowing someone so long. today has been a good day so far. i woke up in time to get ready for church, got there on time, ate pancakes for breakfast, got to drive, home alone, made a new cd, written many poems.... but this little thing will cyndi wont fail to upset me and give me another ulcer. my stomach always hurts when i'm upset or i eat that stupid frozen pizza in the freezer---and ive done both today, so that means i'll die today. hm, i guess this friday is obsolete. if thats even the correct usage of the word... there i go being austentacious (or ostentatious.. whatever). i miss him so much.
I am currently Calm
I am listening to million tears- kasey chambers