Comes the next
08/20/2008 12:21 a.m.

Status quo, always lurking just beneath the fray of everyday business. Always the same. Not too much changing.

But I'm a gypsy. Always traveling, me. I figured out recently that I've moved over 60 times in my life, in more 22 different cities. It's taught me to thrive on a certain amount of change, a certain level of newness. Sometimes life just brings it. Sometimes I have to go searching for it.

And some things never change. My love for certain individuals. My craving for permanence in a world that never stops. My dream of being slender one day.

Realistically, I don't think I'll ever have it. At 45, I think the time for making big dreams come true has passed. Reality mostly disappoints, and I'm sure my contribution to it is a major factor. I don't know where I'll end up. Some days I'm good with it, some days it eats at me.

At least I'm not a stark raving bitch today.

I am currently: numb
Listening to: the phone ring