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The Journal of A. Paige White 10/10/07
10/10/2007 02:00 p.m.
THINGS I HAVE LEARNED LIVING IN MISSISSIPPI
1. Possums sleep in the middle of the road with their feet in the air
2. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 live in MISSISSIPPI.
3. There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 live in MISSISSIPPI plus a couple no one's seen before.
4. If it grows, it sticks; if it crawls, it bites.
5. Onced and twiced are words.
6. It is not a shopping cart; it is a buggy.
7. Fire ants consider your flesh as a picnic.
8. People actually grow and eat okra.
9. Fixinto is one word.
10. There is no such thing as "lunch". There is only dinner and then there is supper.
11. Ice tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you're two. We do like a little tea with our sugar!
12. Backards and forwards means "I know everything about you."
13. Jeet? Is actually a phrase meaning "Did you eat?"
14. You don't have to wear a watch because it doesn't matter what time it is. You work until you' re done or it's too dark to see.
15. You don't PUSH buttons, you MASH them.
YOU KNOW YOUR FROM MISSISSIPPI IF:
1. You measure distance in minutes.
2. You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
3. You use "fix" as a verb. Example: "I'm fixing to go to the store "
4. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect or animal.
5. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.
6. You know what a "DAWG" is.
7. You carry jumper cables in your car...for your OWN car.
8. You only own four spices: salt, pepper, Tabasco and ketchup.
9. The local papers cover national and international news on one page but require 6 pages for local gossip and sports.
10. You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.
11. You find 100 degrees Fahrenheit "a little warm".
12. You know all four seasons: Almost Summer, Summer, still Summer and Christmas.
13. You know whether another MISSISSIPIAN is from HATTIESBURG, north or south as soon as they open their mouth.
14. Going to Wal-mart is a favorite past time known as"goin' Wal-martin"or off to "Wally World"....Mall Mart
15. You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good pinto-bean weather.
16. A carbonated soft drink isn't a soda, cola or pop...it's a Coke, regardless of brand or flavor. Example: "What kinda coke you want?"
17. Fried catfish is the other white meat.
18. We don't need no stinking driver's Ed....if our mama says we can drive, we can drive.
19. You understand these jokes and forward them to your friends from MISSISSIPPI (and those who just wish they were). Not EVERYONE can be a MISSISSIPIAN, it's an art form and a gift from God!
So true it hurts my face from grinning!
Well well well. What I didn't think would happen, did. He actually bothered to send me another email. Lovely one too. Designed to do nothing but hurt me some more. It did, but it didn't last long. I AM getting over him. The letter helped more than anything else could have. I can't believe it, but I'm actually grateful he worded it exactly as he did. Megan's adamant response when I cried as I read it to her was "just tell him to eff off. Do it Mama. He just wants to keep hurting you." There really is no other explanation for it. I looked all through it to try to find a legitimate reason that he would have to simply reiterate what he'd already said in his last one and couldn't. I honored his desires and wishes. That just wasn't good enough. I might be getting better, time to send another letter designed for nothing but to trigger my sense of loss again. It worked for a few minutes but in a weird way, it flamed so hot it burned it all up.
Well apparently not all. When will the hurt go away. It helped for a little while anyway. I do not understand why he had to do that. I was getting better. I guess that's why.
I am currently Bleh
| Member Comments on this Entry |
| Posted by James Zealy on 10/11/07 at 05:33 AM I hate to tell you paige, but what you described there is North Carolina to a teebone. The temperature is usually a bit more moderate, but the south is the south what can you say. On the other, bare it ,tell him to kiss it good bye cuzz he ain't never gonna see it agin. |
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