Toxic nights
09/08/2007 08:05 a.m.
Early morning drinking as the rum mixes with diet soda, and the cigarette burns the lungs. All I can do is watch the destruction boil in me. Lyrics flutter and hit every chord in my heart. All the tragedy and accidents makes me laugh, and people copy me. Wearing the darkness on their sleeves makes them more distance to me. nobody knows me but me. Fame isn't what I want. fortune is only security, and love is just a rememberance of living. So what's the point when all I want is to forget and see beauty all around me. Remember that I'm the lonely one left in it all. Nobody wants to be me, and those who try can only remember the romantic views. All the hatred and frustration burns in my eyes. Sadness glares outward and midnight has come and lovers sleep but I'm viewing from the outside staring and the world is always inside.
I am currently Brooding
I am listening to Ready Aim Misfire- New Year's Day

How easy it is to feel alone even in a room full of people. We ache for a connection and they come so rarely. I have thought for more years than I care to remember that human connection is the hardest thing to attain and when we think we have it I'm not sure we aren't just fooling ourselves. The mind is such a devious element of the human body.