Total lunar eclipse
08/28/2007 10:35 a.m.
I was just outside, watching. Amazing.

Maybe that's what I've been feeling all month. Crying for no apparent reasons, and for reasons I haven't cried about for years; feeling insecure, and needy; feeling the sadness of the ages weighing me down like the roots of a thousand year old tree; feeling the pointless direction of this society, watching myself try to step out of the procession and trail off into uncharted territory without a map; feeling lost and misguided, but driven to not follow the masses just the same, not play the game by the current rules; feeling dissatisfied with so much of what's going on globally and personally; and feeling overwhelmed by inertia and lack of intention; and ultimately feeling as if something is not quite "right" in the whole scheme of things, as if a major shift is about to take place.

I was just outside, watching, and I realized I have no song in my heart for the astonishing journey of our galaxy and how the magic is visible, like tonight, and how irresponsible that is to be so ill prepared for such a unique display.
I am currently Awestruck
I am listening to the relentless cry of the trains