im cold.
08/23/2007 07:57 p.m.
so yesterday.. the guy who tried to break down my walls, the guy who i tell nearly everything to, the guy who transferred sophomore year and would later come to tell me that if we had been dating, he probably would have stayed, the guy who ive been through a million ups and downs with, the guy who some of my poems are about, the guy who would sent me rotten potatoes to prove a point, but most of all the guy i considered one of my best friends for the past four years.. he called me a cold, cold person. and believe me, that was the nicest of things he had to say.

id be lying if i said i didnt see this coming.
but its still heartbreaking to lose such an important friendship.

i really need to start working on myself. i put people at such a distance. its like i give everyone a little part of me, but no one ever gets the whole thing. and i honestly dont know why i do it anymore. its this terrible habit thats instilled in my brain and it gets me nowhere except hurt. a sort of self fulfilling prophecy, if you will.

anyways i need to stop tying. because im at work. and i dont cry in public.
but if anyone read this, thanks for listening. and sorry for rambling slash being a cliche girl.
I am currently Melancholy