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The Journal of A. Paige White S.C.
11/12/2006 10:23 p.m.
11/12/06
Revelation is flooding in. I feel like I’m going in overload.
This shaking continues even if it’s only internal.
I recognized the eternal in a casual exchange with a beautiful, little princess named Eva.
What an awesome God our God is!
That He cares so much about this one little girl, He would have two people dress up in order to announce His presence and the presences He will soon be revealing to her (and that geographic region) through the host in order to make it memorable for not only her but me
What a privilege.
I certainly am not worthy of this
But, my soul and spirit chuckle with glee, that it is his body and soul, bought and paid for with the most precious commodity - medium of exchange- that is in our eternal existence:
The blood of Christ
I am His to mould and shape into whatever He desires
I am so thrilled
I am so jittery
I am so excited
I am so awestruck
I am so humbled at His humility
I am so very in love with this God
So many things He shows! I am so shaken
I am so shaken
I am shaking
I really don’t think I ever asked to be a seer.
I really don’t
I don’t remember it
I don’t remember asking that
How could I, I didn’t even know what it was, much less that it was a real phenomenon
But I did ask for the gift of encouragement and exhortation
Is that how it’s to be had then?
Kewl
Yes, Lord, I understand the need to sheathe the claws I’ve been stretching in experimentation as it is demanded and of utter importance in going one step forward from here.
I WILL OBEY
This is my declaration
Because you love me, you will empower me and gift me and protect me.
11/11/06
What is going on in my world?
What is it?
Strange light descending to the west
Not white but bluish white
I already know what it is.
It just freaks me out by the ramifications
Before 8:00 last night (11/10/06)
I saw it while Logan and I wagoneered our usual driveway circuits
He, wrapped in his blanket, Nana, harnessed in dark clothing, appropriate for the day
but not in the night
If you should be overcome with traffic which could consist of even one vehicle
down our quiet street
Strange light descends
Except it seems of home
It’s almost too much.
Introduced to Chrioni, companion of Gabriel
Feeling the reality of their presence so strongly my vision was constantly blurring with tears
It was too much
Such holiness is blinding
Just the remembrance brings again the rain
Oh blessed God, please let them have visited Alex’s family
It was in their direction
Please separate Alex for your great work
Please release the understanding of the great work of salvation undertaken just for him
And how he should best spread this wondrous news of the gospel of peace, of our almighty Christ, champion and captain, vested now with majesty but once the wretchedness of my sin
He did that for me
I step outside to smoke tentatively looking for that light again
What exactly was that?
This journal will be my Sefer Chalomot.
This is all very strange...
To get an art kit delivered to my place of employment within an hour of a telling exchange is no coincidence. Then the book "Dream Language" that must be purchased.
What happened today?
Well, not much. Spent the day adoring Logan. Not feeling up to snuff physically but soon after awakening to get a call from a friend that made me chuckle-- lots. More time reading about the Lord's use of angels from one of the other three books that just had to be added to my library and sensing His radiance so strongly to keep my vision unblurred from the tears was a constant task. This is all so new. So strange. I am not sure who I am. I know it is an adventure in this becoming I wouldn't miss for the world, even when it becomes exceedingly uncomfortable with more and more strange occurrences almost daily.
I'm freaking out.
But in a good way.
Whom did I encounter?
Just the family, other than phone calls, one new deepening of a friendship that I so enjoy with Kathy.
different feelings you experienced?
Tears, lots of tears.
Love, Love, Love
Typical exasperation with teenage mentality
Love, Love, Love
Awe at the love being poured out on God's children, right now
Awe at the revelation abounding everywhere!
Awe at His revealed presence and the revelations increasing exponentially
Sorrow for my sins, great sorrow
What did I feel proud of?
My children, my grand child, The bride of Christ as revealed in Psalm 45... that one will knock your socks off
What do I wish I could improve upon?
oh wow. This list could go forever
My parenting skills. I gotta quit smoking. Need to keep house better.
Discipline in prayer and meditation
Repentance for the sins that keep God’s blessings halted at a distance
I am currently Awestruck
I am listening to Beastley purring
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