A Sense of Urgency
04/18/2006 09:42 p.m.

April 6th, 2006

I have always had certain goals ever since I became 'aware'. These goals were formulated based on my refined dreams based on my new found concept of meaning. These goals remain unfulfilled since I failed to give priority to my priorities. My life in its manifestations on the scale of time went by, getting 'stuck' every here and there.

This morning I woke up dejected, as usual. My defense mechanism came up with a thought in the form of a trick, yet another, to trick my self. Outwardly, the trick looked simple and I hoped this would not attain the same fate as all my other tricks have so far. The trick is to infuse and reinforce 'a sense of urgency' at the start of the day and stick to my priorities at every start, whether it's my office or home, returning back to the top priority after every drift and indulgence, whether intentional or unintentional. I felt confident that this will set the ball rolling and from here I would move to other priorities and necessities for the upkeep of my external life with a sense of urgency, and then shall return to my top priority. How can one drift afar or indulge in any distraction when one is in a hurry to return somewhere?

With this trick in my mind I started my day and found that I finished my morning routine saving almost one hour. How did this happen? I evaluated the whole situation and concluded that this was simple. With this sense of urgency in the back of my mind I had hurried through everything refusing to indulge in anything, and refusing to take notice of the distractions. This sense of urgency was driving me from within to finish what I was doing and to return to my priority number one. I wasn't rushing through anything but then I wasn't indulging in anything. I was doing everything as part of my duty in the wake of my life situation. This drive was also working as a barrier, never allowing my attention to drift to sticky grounds.

By the way, when I was evaluating the savings and analyzing the causes, I realized that I could have saved some more time, at least another twenty, if not thirty minutes. I also realized that in the course moving along my routine with this sense of urgency I got angry twice. Once when I was barricaded by a person, and once by my own indulgence. I decided to be careful next time and not let my anger take an upper hand.

On the whole, I did get 'stuck' and drift, but I was 'aware' of my indulgence and drifts. This awareness propelled me to struggle and de-stuck. We waste so much life and energies in indulging and drifting from our priorities. This is my realization of the day. This trick will work miracles I am damn sure. Six hundred percent.

PS: Despite being on my toes almost all day, I just couldn't return to my top priority even once. I found so many secondary priorities barricading my way. I decided to undo them by doing, so that they will not barricade my walk on the path which shall lead me to my goal.