tv found not guilty of brain molestation
06/16/2005 07:02 p.m.
((posted on 6.14 on myspace))

((sorry, i had to write about it))

ok america, you did it yet again... and i'm going to be hitting myself in the face for weeks over this one. i specifically enjoyed all the aerial shots from helicopters, really emphasized the distance of things, the lengths to which we're willing to go as a nation; how tiny we all really are from way up there in guy-with-camera land.

as i sit here in my humid air-condition-less apartment, sweating like a leather-bound man being whipped in a fiery dungeon, as i sit here i'm intrigued by my television -- this is a rarity, which i'll attribute accordingly to the heat.

so i'm sitting here, amidst my addiction to myspace.com, pathetic.org, & colum.edu (my school site), my addictions are temporarily interrupted by a commercial for dr. phil... ok, look, i'm a sucker sometimes for these self-discovery, over-coming addiction, healer-type shows. this ad was about a troubled teen whose mother wanted help... and so on. ok television-enhanced brainwasher guy... you got my attention. i'll watch.

well well. what a sneaky little prick you are tv mind-eraser guy. you got me to watch dr. phil because you knew that shortly into the intense story line you'd interrupt. you had this trick planted firmly up your sleeves. i should have seen this shit coming.

so mr. tv control freak guy cuts to an aerial shot of a plane crash somewhere in florida, some aircraft of some kind crashed in a residential area, the white puddle of white stuff to the right of your screen is the remaining mess caused by said crash.

then mr. tv juggernaut cuts to another aerial shot somewhere over california. a convoy of black suv's cruise down a highway, and mr. tv voice tells me that a verdict has been reached in the michael jackson case, and that we'll cut back to regularly scheduled programming while we wait for mj to reach the courthouse where the verdict will be read. now back to doctor fill.

see also: rehab.
see also: stimulant.
see also: therapy.

i'm addicted. even myspace is on hold. i left AIM without posting a wicked retahded away message. i'm in limbo. dr. phil's head blabs and blabs and blabs and now i can't decide what i care about more. i'm still sweating, i have yet to shower, and i'm about to find out the fate of the former king of pop. ok america, you did it yet again...

the anticipation is... well, anticipated? i think my brain died. and i'm waiting, and the heads on tv are talking, and we're waiting for the judge to turn the audio on. and it happens. finally.

NOT GUILTY!?!?!?

what the fuck? am i drunk? am i wide awake and hearing this shit?

oj simpson... robert blake... michael jackson... i see where this bullshit is going. i get it. we only convict shop-lifters and martha stewart nowadays. i just can't, i can't... i can not wrap my mind around this. you find the weirdo guilty of something. you had ten chances. ten! not guilty? he’s the self-proclaimed smooth criminal. you find him guilty.

okay, okay. i thought about it. i'm reminding myself of that old proverb about the book and its cover. and i'm trying not to judge. i'm trying really hard not to judge. but c'mon... the man (if you can call him that) is a walking freak show. if the country were a hollywood film michael would be the token creepy guy. (he used to be the token black guy, but things change)

see also: plastic surgery.
see also: witness protection.
see also: identity theft.

since then i've been outside. i shut off the tv, left myspace, left my apartment, and i had time to recoup... now i'll kick back and let late night talk shows mock the mockery out of this entire thing.

but seriously if anyone ever told me that i was molested... i know who i'd point my finger at.

save my brain. save my brain.

I am currently Awestruck