circles, faith, me, and my God
05/18/2005 04:45 a.m.
Webster defines a circle as: a complete or recurring series, cycle. Faith as: an unquestioning belief in God. And me as: well, I suppose that Webster can't define me ~ at least not yet. And we all know, God can not be defined.

Circles seem to be a big part of my life. Take for instance ~ I speak about them in my bio. And just this evening, a fellow Patheticer (I think I made up a word there) and I were chatting. And somehow we made this huge conversational circle. Very fulfilling, but a circle nonetheless. We ended where we started. Thus the circle. And in my personal journal(you know, the one only me and the voices get to partake in) ~ just tonight I ended up writing on my life as a big, fat circle. Going nowhere.

Now, just as much as circles seem to be a big part of my life ~ my faith is much bigger. (I bet most of you didn't know that.) I don't talk about it that much. My faith that is. I know I need to. And perhaps even more importantly, I need to write about it. In writing, I share. And sharing is what it is all about. But you see, I am not one of those pushy Christians. (This is the part where I ask that no rude or otherwise negetive comments are left on the basis of my faith ~ and I thank you very humbly in advance.)

I try my best to keep all my affairs(affairs meaning daily life) clean, but I am flesh afterall and sometimes that creeps in. The flesh that is. I try and display a gentle person, not judgemental, not fingerpointing, not hypocritical. Merely loving and compassionate. It is my goal in life to let my faith in God portray the person I am. And I rely on that faith, my God to get me through my days. Not only my days ~ but this life.

Now, I know what you are thinking ~ and if you are still reading(thank you)I am almost done. There is alot I want to write about tonight. And I am afraid that if I don't hold back, my first novel might ensue. (insert laughter here) So I will get to my point.

Tonight after all my circles had been made, I sat down at my computer and just started talking to God. You know, praying. Asking Him for something, anything. I just needed to hear Him. And of course, most of you know how much I like quotes. I have this flip-book of quotes on top of my monitor. I haven't flipped it since mid-March. And I knew in my heart of hearts to flip to May 17th and see what today had to say. And for all of the unbelievers reading this ~ just please take it as my journal and nothing more than God using a moment to speak to one of His children.

My heart skipped a beat, and I knew God had just whispered to me. This was the quote:

God came to us because God wanted to join us on the road, to listen to our story; and to help us realize that we are not walking in circles but moving toward the house of peace and joy. Henri J. Nouwen

Nothing more need be said.
I am currently Awestruck
I am listening to the whisper of God.