My Day in Bum Flippin Egypt
06/14/2004 06:10 a.m.
Well, it actually went off without too many hiccups. Neither Jess nor Kate went...it was just me, the kids' dad (who is not my current ex, for those who may be wondering), Jennell and Amanda for the nearly three hour drive. And then after we got there, the ex's sister, her husband and the ex's (and sister's) mom and of course, my third triplet, Steven.

Amanda was bored stiff due to her immobility (broken ankle) but otherwise it was ok. Of course, my ex sister-in-law's husband took us WAY out in the middle of bum-flippin Egypt. No bathrooms. So the first thing that happens is I have to go to the bathroom because, Nooooooo, I couldn't go when we stopped at Safeway (that would have been too civilized apparently) and I promptly, with great care and precision (so as not to get my shoes wet) pee into the wind. Didn't Jim Croce warn about that in one of his songs......wait, that's spitting into the wind. Anyway. Not a great way to start the day after three hours on the road with my ex husband's DRY WIT!!!! YIKES!!! On the way home, I tell the ex, "You know, I don't remember you being this funny when we were married," and he says, "Oh yes, I was always this funny," to which I reply, "ummmmmm, no......no you weren't. Things were NOT this funny. Ever. Besides, I would have remembered that! Yes, I definitely would have remembered that..."

The food was amuzingly shaken and not stirred during the ride on the little trailer they were towing down that long bumpy 6 miles of one lane dirt road, but it still tasted good. Oh, and it was good to see that my ex mother-in-law had not lost her sense of tact. Right after I tell them about my looking into nursing school, she says, "Now, Alison, I don't mean ANY offense AT ALL...but honey, have you thought about how hard it's going to be, being as overweight as you are, to be on your feet all day? I'm only thinking of your health, you know..." I shoo it away with one motion of my hand and say, "Ah, I'll be fine. Under this HUGE layer of FAT is one great, STRONG set of muscles. I'll be GREAT on my feet all day." Oh, and then when my ex's brother-in-law says, "Hey, I hear they're paying for nurses to go the Outback in Australia..." the darling ex replies, "WHAT are you THINKING? The woman can't even pee in the woods and you expect her to make it in the OUTBACK????"

Overall, it went off without any real hitches to speak of. And the things that WERE uncomfortable, I just have to laugh them off. By the end of the day, however, I was definitely ready to hand the ex back to his current wife, and with secret thanks during my prayers tonight, I will tell God how glad I am that things have worked out the way they have.



I am currently Exhausted
I am listening to the fan on my refrigerator